sits, watching under the tree as my fingers touch the trunk i hear it whisper come to me inch forward even closer both palms pressed against it i smile is this enough? no, even closer, it whispers you belong here with me the bird sits, watching as i dig around it the smell of soil … Continue reading the bird →

some nights I wake up from a bad dreamtears pooling maybe a nightmare, then monsters chasingfireballsand bulletsbroken legs the stuff of nightmares, really chaos all of meall for meall at me amidst all thisis a faceunknown to me for yearswatchingthose eyesnever maliciousalways the same, gentle, even when I jump off a buildingor choke on blood … Continue reading you, stuff of nightmares →

the colour of your skin or the weight you hold in your body the length of your hair and maybe the width or the clothes you don't wear and the shoes you can't be, just that what are you? the colour of your eyes or the teeth maybe skin bare (ing) make up or the … Continue reading what are you? →

too many swarming buzzing inside me and outside attacking crawling no sense nonsense where is my drink? to drown them

from the beginning a fractured sleep pain with no origin curse of being a female a 40-min car ride of a wailing toddler the incessant 'whys' another morsel or a sip of water brush your teeth two minutes a nappy change a story read a chapter read some emails replied some texts too too many … Continue reading things that pile up →

you run around here and there looking half crazed hair not tied now mostly white a racing heart speech very fast yes yes yes you want this you want that you must have that you need that too on fire days brimming with things you must do how else to survive plus strive to thrive … Continue reading rat race # 2 →

is relative to what was then (sleep-ins) what is now (not sleep-ins) what will be later (what sleep-ins?) valuing spending your time on with doing or not so mothering is cuddles with my toddler loving him is loving parts of me wet kisses all day long i don't feel so lonely (sometimes a little stifling) … Continue reading mothering →

has a nightmare 2am wakes up screaming blood-curdling absolute nightmare to calm so i hold my sun burning my arms we talk about the monster what color, i ask? yellow, he says what shape, i ask? circle, he says how big is it, i ask big like you, he says a night lamp on our … Continue reading my sun →

myself for the next few weeks until the end of this year and the beginning of new simply, step 1: bare feet most of the time step 2: touching the ground (hands acceptable too) sometimes treading lightly other times, a firm stance horizontal or vertical diagonal even distraction from the distraction for ex, if the … Continue reading grounding →