mothering

is

relative to

what was then

(sleep-ins)

what is now

(not sleep-ins)

what will be later

(what sleep-ins?)

valuing

spending your time

on

with

doing

or not

so

mothering is

cuddles with my toddler

loving him is loving parts of me

wet kisses

all day long

i don’t feel so lonely

(sometimes a little stifling)

experiencing the world with him

sometimes fun

and challenging

repetition isn’t my strong suit

while

he thrives on it

the quest for knowledge

every question a ‘why’

his never ending energy

the opposite of infectious

my momentum

dragging

slow paced now

putting him to bed for the night

exchanging

‘i love you’s

more kisses

extra long cuddles

promises of all the fun

tomorrow holds

sigh

then

a cup of tea

basking in the solitude

hours stretch before me

ahhh, the luxury

what privilege

to first

exercise

(a signal to stop mothering)

then

read, think, write

(not in that particular order)

completely immerse

recharge with every page turn

jot it down

connect all

the pieces

in peace

consilience

deep breaths

going to bed

knowing

today

i have loved

i am loved

no guilt

for stealing time

for myself

from myself

so i can do it

all over again

tomorrow

mothering, that is.